Home Sweet Home
by CynCity49
Summary: After her father's death, Renee finds herself packing up and moving to LA to live with her somewhat overbearing mother. When she meets Big Time Rush, will they change her mind about the fakeness of today's music industry? Rating may change later on.
1. Chapter 1

"Welcome to L.A., Miss Dawson." I nodded my head at my Mom's personal driver, wondering why she had to go to such extremes for me to visit her. She'd been wanting me to visit her since I starting living with my Dad, and now she got what she wanted, and more. My Dad had been diagnosed with lung cancer the year before and died suddenly, right after things seemed to be getting better. Mom was happy that I was coming to live with her, although she tried to hide it behind missing my Dad. Sure, they fought, but they once loved each other.

"Please, Lewis. Call me Renee," I chuckled, following him to the limo. He smiled at me, his teeth brighter than his baby blue eyes. I slid onto the leather seats, tugging on the loose strings of my jean shorts. Mom had bought me a whole new wardrobe with skirts and dresses, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to try to smuggle some pants.

L.A. couldn't be that bad.. Could it?

After what seemed like forever, we finally arrived at my new home. It was a two-story brick house, with wide windows and stone accents. Inside was filled with brand new furniture and fancy chandeliers.

Of course, I expected no less from my high-maintenance, cosmetic selling mother. My room, according to my mother, was the only downstairs bedroom and branched off from the den. She'd told me that she'd already decorated my room, no doubt with my older sister's help. Mom knew if she herself decorated my room, she'd throw some pink in there, and I'd throw a hissy fit. What can I say? I'm not girly, no matter what she wanted me to be. She could mold Darcy, not me.

The den was where I would spend a lot of time, I'd already decided. There was a clear sliding door that led to the backyard garden, with sheer white curtains covering the view. A white, woven daybed with honey colored throw pillows sat across from a stone fireplace, a spool side table sitting next to it. Adjacent to the fireplace was a honey colored drawer desk with a hutch, books piled in most of the cubbies, pens & pencils collected in a mug sporting the Eiffel Tower. My favorite section of the den was in the very corner, under a small window where a latte colored ottoman stood, Mom's sky blue silk robe draped over it, as if she'd been too tired to take it to her room. I scooped up the fabric, pressing it to my cheek, the scent of her perfume wafting in my nose. Laying the robe back where it was, I grabbed my only suitcase and found my way to my room.

My room had been painted as if it were fog; light grey with smoky white trims. Both windows were covered with curtains that were white at the top and got darker as the fabric reached the end of the pane. The queen sized bed was sleek, pushed into the corner, the hardwood frame covered in white padding. The duvet pictured a grey wolf in the snow. Next to the bed was a burgundy garden seat, which matched the medium-sized dog sofa at the end of the bed. In another corner sat a grey, tufted hourglass shaped chair, a three-dimensional burgundy rose pillow atop it. Under an oversized iron antique clock sat a vividly hued amethyst chest, color-coordinated with a secretary desk that sat in the last corner.

I gaped as I pushed aside a white wooden sliding door, revealing a walk-in closet. Everything was organized, from the dresses to the belts to the sunglasses to the shoes. As I peered further into the colorful closet, I noticed another door in the back of the closet. It led to my bathroom, _my very own _bathroom. Porcelain was the main feature in this bathroom. There was a stand-up shower and a Jacuzzi bathtub and two sinks. Why I would need two sinks, I didn't know, but I didn't care. I was still wonderstruck by every inch of the place. My Dad's place had been a run-down shack that had been passed from one generation to the next, nothing special about it. Here, I had _my own_ _bathroom_, with an antique makeup table with an oval mirror, a small stool to accompany it.

Honestly, I'd never seen such luxury.

Telling myself that I'd have plenty of time to check out the rest of the house, I began to unpack. I'd only packed a few necessities, as they were Mom's orders. She told me she'd buy me anything I needed if I truly needed it, but I could still salvage a few things before my old house was passed on to another relative. Suddenly I heard an annoying ringing, confused as to where it was coming from until I saw a silver wall phone near my closet door.

"Renee, it's Mom."

"Oh, hi." I settled onto the garden seat, finding that it was actually comfy. "I just got here, like, ten minutes ago. Why is there a house phone in my room anyway?"

"It's not the home phone, it's your own personal line. If you look in the drawer of your makeup table, there's a cellphone too. All of the numbers are written on the chalkboard."

Chalkboard?

True to her word, there was a small chalkboard in my closet, and all the phone numbers were written in Mom's loopy handwriting.

"Now, Renee, I want you to get ready. Once I get home from work, we'll be heading out to see your Aunt Kelly. She'll be at work herself, but she says that they only have one client for today. Please try and make yourself presentable."

"Fine, Mom. Love you too," I said sarcastically, slamming the phone back onto the hook. After a quick shower and forever of searching through rainbow frills, I finally found something somewhat decent. The ruffled dress reached mid-thigh, flowers painted in oranges in reds portrayed, a brown belt restricting my waist. The background color, ivory, matched the strappy wedged Toms I'd found. As for makeup, I settled for nude lip gloss and brown mascara & eyeliner, which brought out the green in my hazel eyes. Mom arrived home around noon, something rare for her profession. For the most part, she looked the same, minus the few stray grey hairs that hid in her jet black curls, one of the few things I'd inherited from her. She enclosed me in a tight hug, claiming that I'd grown so much since last October. Once I finally shook her off, she examined my outfit.

"It needs one more thing," she decided, hopping up the stairs. I lingered on the latte ottoman, tracing the fabric with my fingertips. When Mom came back down, she held a necklace in her grasp. It looked like brass, with a very detailed owl hanging from the end. "Open it." She smiled anxiously as I popped open the locket. An old picture of Dad stared up at me, his fingers laced through mine as I sat on his lap. I'd only been four or five at the time. My lips were curled in a devious smirk, but his smile shined brighter than anything I'd seen.

"Thank you, Mom," I whispered, tears pooling my eyes. She closed the locket and clasped it around my neck, pulling back my curls to keep them from being stuck in the chain. We walked out to her car, since I'd convinced her not to take the limo. The last thing I wanted was to be seen riding in a limo in downtown L.A. with my mother.

Aunt Kelly was really the only family on my mom's side that we were still in contact with. Mom was adopted, so she was the odd-one-out on most family occasions. Unlike Aunt Kelly's dark complexion, Mom was cursed with paleness, which accentuated her oddness. Lucky for me, Dad was Native American, and tanned very easily. I was stuck somewhere in the middle of those.

Despite the lack of shared DNA, Aunt Kelly could've been Mom's twin, personality wise. The two of them together was always a sight to see.

It didn't take long to arrive at Rocque Records. Aunt Kelly was waiting by the entrance, tapping her foot as she talked on her cellphone. She seemed upset, which most likely meant she was talked to Gustavo. I'd met him once or twice, and he just seemed angry all the time, for no apparent reason. According to Aunt Kelly, he only got worse with this new band around.

"Hang on, Gustavo! Yeah, Camellia just got here, I'll be up in a minute. Don't kill the dogs, because if you do, we'll _both _be out of a job!" She slid her phone back into her pocket, opening her arms to us. "Cam! You look amazing!" Mom kissed her cheek and squeezed her tight, like she'd done to me. "And look at you, Ren! You're all grown up! Oh, God, I guess I should've thought this through a little more." Kelly chewed on her bottom lip, looking over my outfit. Mom narrowed her eyes at her.

"What do you mean, Kelly?"

"The client that we have today is Big Time Rush, a boy band. And they're all teenagers whose hormones are probably raging. Crap, I'm sorry, Cam. I thought Ren would be dressed like she normally is! You know, her jeans and sweatshirts," Aunt Kelly sighed, ruffling her hair. I stuck my tongue out at Mom, who did it right back. _Gee, what great parenting. _

"Well, let's just get it over with."

We headed upstairs, where Aunt Kelly led us to a sound booth. Gustavo was facing us, ignoring the boys fighting in the booth behind him. The sound had been turned off. As soon as we walked in, the fighting stopped, and they all rushed out of the booth. All four of them were built, so I figured right off the bat that they played sports.

"Dogs, this is Kelly's sister, Camellia, and her niece.." Gustavo left it hanging in the air. I sighed as all eyes were placed on me.

"Renee. Call me Ren."

"Hi, I'm James," a brunette said seductively, taking my hand and kissing it. The rest of them rolled their eyes.

"James, you always get the girl!" the small Hispanic whined. He stuck out his hand, and I grabbed it, thankful he wasn't throwing himself at me. "I'm Carlos."

A shorter brunette with big brown eyes stepped out from behind James, tapping Carlos' helmet. "I'm Logan." He smiled a crooked grin and I returned it. Finally the last one stepped up.

This one seemed to be the leader. He was tall, almost lanky, but his build made up for it. His blond hair almost reached his bushy eyebrows, but not quite. His eyes caught me off guard. They were a mossy green, and they caught the light perfectly. My eyes trailed down to his lips. "Don't mind these guys. They've never been anywhere near any female specimen that wasn't related to them, or going to beat them up." He shrugged, and I bit back a laugh as the other boys objected. "I'm Kendall, by the way." His calloused fingers wrapped around my shaky hand, and I couldn't help the smile that found its way onto my lips.

"Okay, okay, enough for introductions. Dogs, get back in the sound booth, and _try _to sound _decent _this time!" Gustavo screeched. They scrambled back to the booth. Logan flashed another grin my way, Carlos tapped his helmet and threw a thumbs up, and James blew a kiss my way. But when Kendall just winked at me, my heart fluttered. I bit my lip to keep from squealing as I began to follow Mom out the door, but she stopped me.

"I need to talk to Kelly alone real quick. Just stay here, and I'll be right back." She pecked my forehead and shut the door behind her. I turned my attention to the "dogs," who seemed oblivious to my presence.

Logan began the song, closing his eyes and pressing a hand to his chest.

"_You, you walked into the room_

_On a Friday afternoon_

_That's when I saw you for the first time_

_And I was paralyzed_

_I had a million things to say_

_But none of them came out that day_

_'Cause I was never one of those guys_

_That always had the best lines."_

James chimed in, leaning closer to the microphone.

"_Time stops ticking_

_My hands keep shaking_

_And you don't even know that.."_

Kendall stepped up to the plate, meeting my eyes as he sung.

"_I try to speak but girl you got me tongue-tied_

_I try to breathe but I'm f-f-f-frozen inside_

_I try to move but I'm stuck in my shoes_

_You got me paralyzed, paralyzed, p-p-p-paralyzed_

_I see you walking, but all you do is pass me by_

_Can't even talk, cause words don't come into my mind_

_I'd make a move if I had the guts to_

_But I'm paralyzed, paralyzed, p-p-p-paralyzed."_

Once again, Logan began to sing again, following Kendall's eyes until he saw me.

"_Now I learned a lot from my mistake_

_Never let a good thing slip away_

_I've had a lot of time to look back_

_And my only regret is.."_

James took on the bridge of the song again, winking at me.

"_Not telling you what I was going through_

_You didn't even know that.."_

Then I was focused on Kendall again, his gaze intense and heavy.

"_I try to speak but girl you got me tongue-tied_

_I try to breathe but I'm f-f-f-frozen inside_

_I try to move but I'm stuck in my shoes_

_You got me paralyzed, paralyzed, p-p-p-paralyzed_

_I see you walking, but all you do is pass me by_

_Can't even talk, cause words don't come into my mind_

_I'd make a move if I had the guts to_

_But I'm paralyzed, paralyzed, p-p-p-paralyzed."_

I couldn't take it anymore. I was overwhelmed. Before they could finish, I walked out, making sure to quietly shut the door behind me. I bumped into somebody, crashing to the floor.

"Oh, I'm sorry." It wasn't my mom, that's for sure. The voice was deep, and as I grabbed his hand to be helped up, I met his eyes. "I'm Jett."

"Renee."

"You're not from around here," he concluded. I shook my head, prying my hand from his grasp. There was something odd about him, and I didn't like it.

"Nags Head, North Carolina. Born and raised."

"Never been."

"Figures," I muttered, pushing past him to find Mom. He grabbed my arm, and I turned to face him, circling my fingers around his hand. He cried out as I began to twist his arm in its socket. "Touch me again, and I will break every known bone in your arm," I hissed. He was caught off balance when I shoved him, causing him to stumble and fall to the ground. When he looked towards the doorway, I looked up to see Kendall, James, Carlos, and Logan, dumbfounded.

"What?" I smiled innocently, swaying my hips as I walked out of Rocque Records. L.A. was actually turning to be really interesting..


	2. Chapter 2

**Before I give you chapter 2, I'd like to thank all the people that reviewed and liked my story and whatnot. It really made my day, waking up to fifteen emails, just from y'all! I'll try to update as soon as I can, at least every 2-3 days. Anyway, if you don't like something that I write or I get something wrong, don't hesitate to tell me. I can take it. This chapter is dedicated to Anon, Dana2184, Ileana, and VampireGrl21 for reviewing chapter one! Sorry if this chapter is shorter than the last one..**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Big Time Rush, or the show, or the songs, or anything. If I did, I'd be with them, not writing this.**

"What exactly did you do to the boys?" Aunt Kelly asked cautiously. We were sitting on the daybed in the den, tea cups wrapped in our palms. Mom was at work, so Aunt Kelly came to visit me on her day off. "When you left, they were all dumbstruck, especially Kendall."

"I_, for one, _didn't do _anything. _Some guy named Jett tried to hit on me, so I twisted his arm and pushed him to the ground. I guess my anger kinda got the best of me." I shrugged, and she gaped at me. "What?"

"Kendall had a girlfriend named Jo, and she cheated on him with Jett. Then she left for New Zealand to be in a movie or something. You probably just made Kendall's whole year. He just got over her not too long ago."

"Damn," I muttered. She nodded, then grabbed her ringing cell from her pocket, pressing it to her ear. She held up one finger to signal that she'd be back, and walked into the hallway. I sighed and grabbed my own cell. There was a new text.

**Unknown Number: Hey, it's Carlos, from the other day. Your mom gave me your number. **

Inwardly, I smiled and added his name to my contacts.

**R: Hi Carlos. What's up?**

**C: Being yelled at by Gustavo. It's a lot worse without Kelly. You?**

**R: With Kelly.. **

**C: So you're the reason she's not here! -_- I thought you were our friend, Ren. I'm disappointed. **

**R: She was my aunt before she was your co-manager, or whatever. :P**

**C: Still not fair. **

Aunt Kelly returned, grabbing her things. "I'm sorry, Ren, I have to go into work. Kendall just called me from the janitor's closet. Gustavo chased them in there, and they've locked themselves in."

"Can I come with you?"

She wasn't expecting that. "Uh, sure. Do you just want to spend the night at my house? I really don't want to drive you all the way back here." I nodded, texting my mom. She replied instantly, agreeing to the idea. Aunt Kelly and I made our way to her car as I texted Carlos back.

**R: Heard you're in the closet. Maybe you should just come out, you know we won't judge you. (;**

**C: -_- You're the one that stole Kelly!**

**R: And that's why we're on our way now. **

**C: Really?**

**R: Open the door, Carlos.**

He obliged, and attacked Aunt Kelly when he saw her. She laughed and patted his back awkwardly. "Nice to see you too, Carlos. Nice to know I can't even have a day off."

"I'M NEVER BEING LOCKED IN A CLOSET WITH YOU AGAIN!" James screamed at Carlos, running towards the bathroom. Logan just shrugged at me, rolling his eyes. Carlos was still hugging Aunt Kelly, but she was trying to peel him off of her. Kendall stepped out, his eyes wide and his hands twitching.

"I'M WITH JAMES ON THAT!" Kendall grunted, following James' trail to the bathroom. I chuckled at Carlos' hurt expression. Logan raised his eyebrows at all of us.

"What just happened?" Logan asked confusedly.

"Shouldn't you know? You were in there with them.."

"Logie-Bear was too busy reading his medical books," Kendall replied, leading James back to our group. "He wasn't subjected to the torture that is Carlos' idea of a prank." I shivered involuntarily when Kendall casually threw his arm around me, and he raised his eyebrows. Aunt Kelly narrowed her eyes at Carlos, who pursed his lips.

"All I did was offer them lemonade!"

"THEN YOU LOCKED US IN AND MADE WATERFALL NOISES!" James retorted. Carlos smirked, and I bust out in laughter, clutching my stomach.

"You mean he almost made you pee your pants?" I asked, still laughing. James glared at me, but Kendall started laughing too. Soon enough, everybody but James was roaring with laughter. Wiping a tear from my eye, I admitted, "That wasn't even that funny, but God, did I need that." James finally cracked a smile, trying to hide it, but failing.

"So, Ren, do you want to come over and hang out? There's an _awesome _pool, and a swirly slide!" Carlos chirped. I looked around at the rest of them, and they all nodded eagerly. Aunt Kelly stepped up and wagged her finger in all of their faces.

"Do remember that she is _my _niece, and I can easily take an early vacation if any of you lay a finger on her. Got it?" she snarled. They all raised their hands up in defeat. Smiling, she turned to look at me. "Try not to break too many hearts. See you tonight." With that, she walked into Gustavo's office, no doubt trying to calm him down.

"I'll take that as we're done for the day," Kendall smirked, looping his arm through mine as we walked out of Rocque Records. James looped his arm through my other one. Logan led us to their car, climbing in the driver's seat. "Logan is the only one with his driver's license," Kendall explained, crawling in the back with James and I. Carlos sat up front.

"So, Renee, where are you from?" James asked, laying his hand on my knee. I pushed him away then pulled my hair back into a ponytail.

"Nags Head, North Carolina. And stop hitting on me, or I will call up my stepmom to shove her boot up your ass. I'm not interested. I already have a boyfriend." He gulped, inching towards the car door. All the others looked stunned. "So where are y'all from?"

"Shakopee, Minnesota," answered Logan, grinning sheepishly.

"Really," I mused. "Why are you in L.A. then?"

"It's a long story that involves giant turds and mean producers," Carlos said, scrunching up his nose. "And large security guards." Letting out a small laugh, I arched my eyebrow at them.

"Long story short, Gustavo and Kelly came to Minnesota to audition people, James made us go with him, they wanted me instead of him, I convinced them to make us a band, and boom!" Kendall motioned to the apartment complex in front of us. I hadn't even noticed that we'd stopped. "Here we are at the Palm Woods, recording albums and arranging tour dates."

"And how does the giant turd fit into this _lovely _story?" I asked as they led me inside. Kendall glanced at his friends, exchanging some telepathic thought or something. On cue, they belted out a song.

"Oh yeah, you're such a turd! Oh yeah, a giant turd!"

I burst into laughter as we walked into the Palm Woods, stopping abruptly when a brunette girl stalked up to us and slapped Kendall across the face. She ran off before anyone could say anything, but the boys didn't seem to care. They kept walking. "Uh, what the hell was that?" They stopped and turned on their heels to look at me.

"That's Camille. She's somewhat melodramatic, and she likes to go around slapping people," Logan shrugged. "You get used to it."

Shaking my head, I continued following them. In the elevator, there was a small brunette girl that looked slightly familiar. Once Kendall stepped in, I realized that she looked like him. "Ren, this is Katie, my little sister. Baby Sister, this is Renee." I shook her hand and leaned against the elevator wall, grasping the metal bar that was there. "You alright?" he whispered, glancing at my knuckles turning white from being clenched too hard.

"I don't like elevators," I admitted, biting my lip. He gave a small smile and took my hand, intertwining our fingers, sending shocks down my spine. Finally the elevator door opened and we all stepped out, Kendall still holding my hand as we walked into their apartment.

"We're home, Mama Knight!" Carlos called out. "I smell snickerdoodles!" Katie, James, Carlos, and Logan raced to the kitchen, leaving just me and Kendall. Mama Knight waltzed out, an apron tied around her waist, her red curls bouncing in a ponytail.

"You must be Renee. The boys tell me that you're Kelly's niece," she greeted, shaking my free hand, smiling when she saw Kendall's hand in mine. "Feel free to help yourself to some snickerdoodles. I'll be heading off to the store." She grabbed her purse and began to walk out, but Kendall stopped her, motioning to the "Kiss Me, I'm The Cook," apron. "Right," she laughed quietly, untying it and throwing it on the bright orange couch. Kendall led me to the snicker doodles, and I do admit, they were delicious. **(A/N: I've never actually had snickerdoodles, otherwise I would've put more detail into that.) **

"Want to go down to the pool?" James suggested, and everybody cheered in agreement. I pulled Kendall aside, who was _still _holding my hand. Not that I was complaining or anything..

"I don't have a bathing suit," I whispered, a blush creeping up my neck. He chuckled, leading me to what I assume was Mama Knight's room.

"My Mom bought this a while back, but she's never worn it," he explained, shrugging, "I guess she doesn't like the rowdy teenagers by the pool." He handed me a two piece bathing suit, the American flag printed on it, then let me change in their bathroom. As I changed, I noticed every hair product under the sea sitting in the shower. Instantly, I knew it was probably all James'. Then something caught my eye in the trash can. Staring up at me was a positive pregnancy test.

_That's not your business, Renee. Stay out of it, _I told myself. I pulled on my white sundress over the bathing suit, sliding on my flip-flops. All the boys were waiting for me, and Katie too, smiling mischievously, sunglasses sitting on her long, brunette hair. As we walked into the lobby, my hand twitched and bumped into Kendall's. He took this as a request to hold hands, and my heart attempted to push its way up my throat. We all picked out our chairs, except for Carlos, who instantly jumped in. When his head popped up, he held up his cell.

"Ah, crap! Not again!" he whined, climbing out and stomping back into the Palm Woods. By the look of displeasure on James' face, I figured Carlos would use his hairdryer to salvage the electronic. I dropped Kendall's hand to peel off my dress, dropping it onto the chair. James, Kendall, and Logan gaped at me.

"What?" I snapped. "You know, you'll catch flies in your mouths if you keep 'em hanging open like that." They closed their jaws, but continued to stare. Logan gulped and abruptly dived into the pool, followed by James. Kendall took two steps towards me, until we were inches away from each other.

"You look beautiful," he murmured, running his fingertips up my ribcage, stopping at the hem of my top. I sucked in a breath, not willing to look into his eyes. I knew if I did, I'd probably kiss him. Suddenly, I was underwater. Once I submerged, I glared at the culprit: Carlos. Kendall had been pushed in too, I noticed.

"Oh, I'll get you for that, Garcia!" I laughed, splashing him with all my might. Kendall, James, and Logan joined in, until Carlos did a cannonball into the water.

***Later That Day

"What movie should we watch?" Logan asked, "And do _not _say _The Notebook, _because last time we watched that, Carlos and James wouldn't stop crying!"

"It was a sad movie, okay?" James defended, crossing his arms. The microwave beeped in the distance signaling that our popcorn was done. When nobody got up to get it, I stood up.

"'Hey Ren, do you think you could get the popcorn?' 'Sure, guys, anything for you!'" I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes as I dodged the guys' legs and feet on my way to the kitchen.

"Thank you, Ren!" they shouted back simultaneously. I grabbed the popcorn bag from the microwave, shaking it so the butter would spread better. Katie walked in and leaned against the counter.

"He really likes you," she concluded, grabbing a large bowl from the cabinet. She sat it in front of me.

"Who?"

"Kendall," she stated. I choked on the piece of popcorn I'd eaten. She patted my back and stole a piece of her own. "If he didn't like you, he wouldn't have given you his jersey." Burrowing my eyebrows, I looked down at the old jersey Kendall had let me wear after getting out of the pool. "It was his first hockey jersey, and he'd never lend it to anybody if they didn't mean something to him."

"But Kendall and I have barely known each other for two days," I reasoned, twirling a strand of my hair around my finger. Shrugging, she stole another piece of popcorn and left.

"_Nightmare on Elm Street_ or _The Notebook_, Ren?" Logan asked me as I walked in. I sat the popcorn on the coffee table, and the boys instantly dug in.

"Definitely _Nightmare on Elm Street._"

"YES!" Logan and Kendall shouted, pumping their fists in the air. I rolled my eyes and pulled my knees to my chest. They turned on the movie and turned off the lights. No matter how scary the movie was, I couldn't concentrate on it, with Kendall's side pressed up to mine. I shuddered, feeling Kendall's eyes on me. He pulled a blanket from the back of the couch and laid it over the both of us, wrapping his arms around me. Gladly, I snuggled into his warm chest, hiding my toes under his thigh.

"You're freezing," he whispered, rubbing his hands in mine, creating friction. His soothing breath was at the nape of my neck, and my eyes slowly drooped. "Go to sleep, Ren. You're tired."

"Don't leave," I murmured, kissing his collarbone. He drew in a shaky breath and nodded, brushing my hair out of my face. The last thing I saw before I finally fell asleep was Freddy Kruger burning into nothing on the TV screen.


	3. Chapter 3

**Good morning starshine, the earth says hello! As mentioned by one of my beautiful reviewers, Renee told James that she had a boyfriend, and then she goes and cuddles with Kendall. Well to that I say; if you moved across the country and you were really tired and there was a hot guy willing to cuddle... YOLO, right? What that boyfriend doesn't know, won't kill him. She'll explain this "boyfriend" later on in this chapter. And I apologize beforehand for my attempts at jokes. And the shortness of the chapter. **

**Disclaimer: Still don't own Big Time Rush.. **

The aroma of pancakes woke me. I was still on the couch, but Kendall was gone, replaced by a blanket. Mama Knight was standing over the stove, Katie sitting at the counter with a mug.

"Kendall's just taking a shower," Mama Knight said, answering the questionable look that I assumed was written on my face. "And the other boys are still sleeping. Katie, why don't you go wake them up?"

"JAMES! CARLOS! LOGAN! WAKE YOUR ASSES UP!" Katie screamed from her seat.

"Katherine Marie Knight, watch your language!" Katie just shrugged, returning her focus back on her coffee. What eleven year old drinks coffee, anyways? I sat next to her, accepting the mug that Mama Knight handed me. After finishing her coffee, Katie laid her mug in the sink and went back to her room. James, Carlos, and Logan stumbled into the kitchen, each kissing Mama Knight's cheek and taking their place at the table. She slid three pancakes on each of their plates, pouring coffee for Logan and James, but not Carlos.

"Why don't I get coffee?" he whined, with a mouthful of pancake.

"Because you're hyper enough already," Kendall stated, kissing his mom on the cheek as he grabbed a plate of pancakes, sitting next to me at the counter, taking Katie's spot. "You sleep okay?" he asked me, pouring syrup on his plate. Mama Knight sat a plate in front of me, and I took the syrup from Kendall, my hand brushing his as I did so. My fingers still tingled as I ate my pancakes.

"Yeah, better than okay, really," I admitted. A smile tugged on his lips. "You?"

"Same here." I could see Mama Knight's smile from the corner of my eye, but I chose to ignore it. "Hey, weren't you supposed to spend the night at Kelly's last night?"

My fork clattered against the plate as I darted towards where my clothes from the day before sat. My phone lay on top, untouched since I'd arrived at the Palm Woods. Fourteen missed calls, eleven text messages.

**Kelly: When are you coming home?**

**Kelly: It's late, you should be heading back now.**

**Carlos: Hey.. I see you. (;**

**Kelly: Renee Oakley Dawson, get your butt here RIGHT NOW!**

**Carlos: I still see you.. ((;**

**Mom: Kelly says you're not back yet.. Are you okay?**

**Katie: HA! I told you he likes you..**

**Carlos: And I see you being all cuddly ;D**

**Kelly: WHERE. ARE. YOU?**

**Kelly: If you do not come home this instant, I will rip off all of those boys' testicles. **

**Carlos: WHY CAN'T I HAVE COFFEE?**

Confused, I looked over at Carlos, who was giving me the puppy dog eyes, holding his phone. I guess he redeemed it from when he jumped into the pool with it. James must have a pretty good hairdryer if it can fix that boy's phone so many times… I replied back to Aunt Kelly, hoping she'd cooled off from last night, sitting on the couch and pulling a pillow to my chest.

**R: Sorry. Fell asleep while watching a movie. **

"Well, we're going to rehearsals soon if you want to come with us," James suggested, finally fully woken up. Kendall fell back onto the couch, laying his head on the pillow that lay in my lap.

"I guess I'll change back into my clothes from yesterday so I can give you your jersey back," I whispered to him, running my fingers through his hair.

"Nah, just keep it for now. At least it'll ensure that I'll see you again." He grinned up at me, and I blushed, remembering Katie's words. _He'd never lend it to anybody that didn't mean something to him. _

Roughly 20 minutes later, we stood in front of Rocque Records. My feet felt like cinderblocks, because I knew I'd get an earful from Aunt Kelly. I suppose the guys had figured that out too, having to drag themselves in to the building. Logan suddenly pulled me to the side, a serious look plastered on his face.

"You said you have a boyfriend."

"Yeah. So?"

"Look, I don't think you're the kind of person that would jerk Kendall around, but if you are, then you should just leave," he growled. I don't think I'd ever seen Logan like this. I'm not sure if anybody had. "Jo did that, and he was heartbroken for longer than he should ever be. He's our leader, band-wise and friendship-wise. And to see him like that…" He squeezed his eyes shut, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Just don't do that to him. If you're here for some kind of fling, just leave. It'll be less of a heartache for all of us."

"I like Kendall, Logan. I do. My relationship with Cody back home is.. complicated, okay? People didn't like Cody, mostly my family and friends. They told me that he didn't treat me right. I always just blew them off, figuring they were just being protective.." I let my face fall into my hands. "But the way Kendall treats me is so.. different." Logan pushed my hands away and met my eyes. "Cody is supposed to visit this week. I'll break up with him then." He nodded, leading me to the sound booth, where the others were waiting. Kendall's eyes lit when we walked in, and I tried to fight the tears that arose. For once, I wasn't crying because of something else Cody had done. How Kendall could care for me so much after so little time, just blew me away. He stepped towards me, but Gustavo stopped him.

"Get in the booth, Dogs!" They obliged, but Kendall was still waiting for me to answer.

_Happy tears, _I mouthed to him. He grinned happily and Logan smiled his crooked smile, obviously content to see his best friend fully over his heartbreak. Suddenly, Aunt Kelly stormed in, pointing her finger at the guys. She pressed the button to talk to them and took a deep breath, no doubt trying to calm down.

"Where is she?" she asked. They all pointed at me, and she turned to glare at me. "I don't care if you spent the night there. Honestly. But if you had just called me or _something, _that would've been nice. I've talked to Ms. Knight, and that's the only reason I'm not chewing any of you out. I'm taking you home, because your mother wants to chat with you." I looked to the guys for help, but they looked as helpless as me. I hung my head as we walked to her car, and I stayed silent the whole time.

"So, you and Kendall," Aunt Kelly began as we settled onto the daybed in the den. Mom sat beside her. "What's going on there?"

"Uh, nothing.." I laughed nervously, twiddling my thumbs.

"Really?" Aunt Kelly smirked, motioning to the jersey. I'd forgotten that I was still wearing it. "And Ms. Knight told me _all about _where you slept last night." I shrugged, trying to hide my blush, but Mom took note of it.

"What about Cody?" Mom asked.

"When he comes to visit, I'll break up with him," I stated, digging my nails into my thighs. They didn't catch it. "I'm sure y'all are ecstatic about that."

"Honey, we just want _you_ to be happy," Aunt Kelly sighed. "If Kendall makes you happy, sweetie, go for it. If Cody makes you happy, stay with him." Mom elbowed her ribs, and Kelly glared at her.

"Cody will be visiting in two days. I don't want either of you here for that, no excuses. I can handle him myself. I'll break up with him, and then I want to go see Kendall. Got it?" They nodded. "Alright then."

***Two Days Later

Hot water ran across my skin and through my hair, masking my tears. I laid my forehead against the cool tile of the stand-up shower, curling my fingers into my palm. Cody's visit replayed in my head, over and over again.

_"Hold on!" I called out to the person at the door. Cody. His hands were pushed in his pockets, observing the area. _

_ "Damn, Oakley," he muttered, using my middle name. "You must be glad your dad kicked the bucket. Look at this place." Pushing away the sting of his words, I shut the door behind him. He wrapped a hand around my neck and pulled me to his lips, but his kisses didn't feel magical. Not like before. I grabbed his hand and led him to my room. Once the door was shut, he slammed me against it, whispering onto my lips, "If I'd known your dad passing was all it took for you to take me to your bedroom, I would've shot that man long ago."_

_ "Dammit, Cody! Get away," I growled, moving to my desk. "I wanna break up." He stalked over to me, his worker boots slapping against the wooden floor, curling his hands around my hips. _

_ "Of course you do, babe. You found yourself a faggot L.A. boyfriend already?" I gritted my teeth, grasping the edge of the desk as he molded his pelvis against mine. _

_ "No. I just don't need you anymore, Cody. This was bound to happen and you know it," I snarled, turning to face him. He took this as an opportunity to push me onto the desk and press his body against me. I wiggled away, kicking right below his gut with my combat boot. I knew there was a reason I'd put those on.._

_ "You bitch!" he spat. _

_ "You know, you were actually a gentleman when we first started dating. I guess I should've known that you'd turn out to be just like your asshole father!" _

_ "My dad treated my mom like a queen! She was the one that pushed him around like a piece of shit!" _

_ "Yeah ,sweetheart, and that's why you ended up living with your mom, and not your dad. Because those bruises she had were from herself. Open your eyes, Cody, your dad beat the shit out of y'all and _left. _Your mom was there for you. But you still turned out with your daddy's genes. Get out of my house, you bastard. I'm done being your punching bag."_

_ "Fine, Oakley, but you'll just come running back. They always do." _

Someone's voice shook me back to reality. Turning off the water, I wrapped a towel around my body, drenched to the bones. The "Dogs" were sitting in my room, observing the place. Lewis, not only being Mom's personal driver but also our butler, had probably let them in. They all turned their attention to me.

"I'll just be in my closet.. Ya know.. Changing," I laughed awkwardly, shutting the door behind me. I let my fingers run across the fabrics of the dresses, pulling out one that was sure to surprise them. The white & red cheetah print stopped at my waist, the black belt prohibiting it to go further, then it puffed out in a flaming red tutu that ended at my knees. Luckily I'd saved my favorite pair of black cowgirl boots, which happened to match the dress in a mix-match kind of way. I stepped out of the closet, meeting Kendall's mossy eyes. He parted his lips, trying to say something, then shut them again.

"Can I talk to Kendall alone, guys?" I asked, not leaving his eyes. In my peripheral vision, I saw them leave, and I stepped towards Kendall, trying to stay calm myself. Kendall gulped, but kept his gaze steady. My knees faltered, and I grabbed onto him for support. The air felt thick, like I could just reach out and grab a handful of it. Finally I stood on my tippy-toes and pressed my lips to his. His hand pressed against my lower back, pulling us closer, while my arms snaked around his neck. All of the tension that had been between us before let out like a dam breaking free, reality slowly slipping away around us. I tangled my fingers in his hair, trailing my nails across his scalp, reveling in the small moan he let slip between us. His tongue swiped against my bottom lip, and I parted my lips, our tongues exploring new territory.

We were breathless when we pulled away, and I leaned into his chest, listening to his heartbeat synchronize with mine.

**A/N: I hope I did the last scene justice! What do you guys think of Cody? Did I put **_**too **_**much into that, or was it okay? Please, please review and tell me, because I love to hear what you guys have to say! It makes me happy to know you all like my story so much that you sneak away and read it (cough cough VampireGrl21 cough cough). :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry for the wait, guys! My sister and I have been feuding, so right now I'm locked away in my room, waiting for her to cool off. I figured I'd try to finish this chapter before going back out there. It's a somewhat uneventful chapter, but I had some fun writing it! Thank you, to all the gorgeous reviewers! I love when y'all review! It makes my whole year! Not that I have a crappy life or anything… Okay, let me stop before I start ranting. Enjoy chapter four! 3**

After one week of living in L.A., you'd think I'd spend all my time out on the town. But, no. Most of the days I spent with the "Dogs" or Camille, whom I'd befriended after spending so much time down at the Palm Woods pool. Finally Camille convinced me to go to a club with her, but not before Kendall fought her on it. He didn't want me going anywhere where, "Creepy men can grope you." And with Kendall and I, we hadn't made anything completely official, but we were spending lots of time together.

"Ren!" Cam snapped, waving a hand in my face. "Come on, lover-girl, stop daydreaming about your Knight in shining armor, and open the door." I hadn't noticing that we were standing in front of my house. I fumbled with the key, but finally got it open. Cam loved my house, and she _adored _my closet, so she insisted we get ready for our "girl's night out," here. She took my hand and raced to my room, instantly going for the clothes. Before I could protest, she throws out an outfit for the both of us, then drags me to the bathroom.

"Before you get dressed, you do your makeup, so it doesn't get on your dress. But we'll start with your hair," she explained, grabbing a box from her large purse. My eyes widened.

"You're not gonna dye my hair, are you?"

She looked flabbergasted. "No. What do you take me for, an idiot? Your hair is gorgeous. But I _am _going to highlight it."

After what seemed like forever and some days, she finally steered me towards the full-length mirror that was on the back of my bathroom door. My curly black hair, now streaked with blonde, was pulled back into a high ponytail with a few strands hanging loose. The midnight purple corset dress I wore cut short at mid-thigh, black lace covering the bottom half. Camille had happily agreed with me on my black combat boots, as long as I also wore a black headband with a small rose on the side. My makeup, as always, was simple, with black mascara and lip-gloss. Camille herself wore a long-sleeved white dress that went right above her knees, matched with pearl earrings and white wedges. Her brown curls spilled across her shoulders, red lipstick smeared on her lips.

"Well don't you girls look gorgeous," Mom complimented, kissing both of our cheeks. "And it's nice to see you again, Camille. I was afraid that if Renee spent too much time with the boys, then she'd turn into one." She shuddered, and Camille giggled.

"Nice to see you too, Ms. Dawson. We'll just be heading out now. I promise to keep your daughter safe." Mom dismissed her promise with a wave of her free hand, the other holding a glass of wine. We headed out to where Lewis was parked, since Mom had convinced us to ride with him in the limo.

The club was huge. I couldn't think of how else to describe it. The bass could be heard from outside, and you could easily tell that there were strobe lights inside.

"How the hell are we able to get in here? We're only 17, Cam," I whispered harshly. She rolled her eyes and led me to the entrance.

"You, my dear Renee, have no faith in me, whatsoever. I, for one, am eighteen, thank you very much. Anyway, I have connections," she sighed, finally reaching the bouncer. "Camille Roberts. She's with me." She hooked a thumb back at me, and I bit my lip.

"Go on in," he grunted. "VIP." Smirking, Camille dragged me to a more secluded area of the chaotic club. We sat in a booth and she ordered us sodas.

"Camille Roberts and Renee Dawson. Fancy meeting you here," James joked, sliding in next to her. He slung his arm around her shoulders and she raised her eyebrows.

"Uh, what're doing, James?"

"Not spying on Ren for Kendall, psh! Why would you even think that?" Logan sputtered, suddenly appearing alongside Carlos. They all cleaned up nicely, I had to admit.

Camille groaned. "Is Kendall here?" Carlos pointed to the dance floor, and my eyes trailed there, trying to find the blond. The butterflies in my stomach hurtled against my gut, and I gulped some of my soda to calm them, which I suppose wasn't that great of an idea.

"I'll go find him," I finally announced, ducking under the red velvet rope, trying to get to the dance floor as quickly as possible. The crowd was overwhelming and overheated, but I kept pushing past them to find Kendall. He wasn't anywhere in sight.

Sweat, alcohol, and lust bounced off of all the bodies that surrounded me. My heart ached for the one that could pull me away from the hectic dance floor, but I quickly retreated from the feeling. I couldn't fall too soon. Or ever.

Kendall's familiar voice filled the speakers, and my spirits dropped when I realized it was only one of his songs. Where was he? Then, all of a sudden, there was a body against mine, his chest pressed to my back, his hands wrapped around my hip bone.

"I have a fucking boyfriend," I muttered, trying to shake loose, I turned to face the intruder. Kendall flashed his teeth when he grinned, still holding onto my hips.

"Boyfriend? I like the sound of that, Renee," he chuckled. I wanted to slap the smirk off his face, but I couldn't stay mad very long with his body so close to mine. Seeming to notice this, he ran his fingers along my spine and massaged the crook between my neck and shoulders.

"Fuck you," I murmured against the skin of his neck.

"Gladly," he whispered back, pressing his mouth to mine. I nipped at his bottom lip and a growl rumbled in his chest, reverberating through my collarbone. We were close enough to not know where I ended and he began, but we didn't care, his tongue probing at mine, my fingers curled around his shirt, his wrapped in my hair, which had somehow been pulled from the rubber-band. Soon enough our hips were pressed against each other as my legs snaked around his waist, his hands moving to my backside to support me.

"Maybe we should go to the club more often," I laughed, out of breath, still clung to him, our foreheads pressed together. He inspected the people around us, grinding and practically dry-humping.

"I think not," he chuckled, setting me on the ground. "Though I do say, you dressing like this isn't such a bad thing." He leaned down and nibbled my earlobe, his breath at the nape of my neck. "Let's get out of here, shall we?"

"What about Camille and the guys? I was Camille's ride."

He shrugged. "James brought us here. He can drive them home. It'll be less of an explosion if we leave now. Camille's probably already pissed that I barged in on 'girl's night.' Am I right, or am I right?" I laughed and slapped his shoulder, pulling him into the limo with me.

"Dammit, Mom must've taken my jacket," I grunted, searching the seats for it, but it was gone. Kendall handed me his, and I gave him a look. "Uh, cliché much? No thanks."

"Ren, I swear, just take it. It's not a diamond ring or something. It's a cheap jacket from Minnesota, compliments of my shitty salary from a grocery store." He shoved it in my lap, and I finally shoved my arms through the sleeves. It was warm, and it smelled like him. I snuggled closer into it.

"You know, if you really like the way I smell _that _much, I'm right here," he chuckled, opening his arms. I blushed, but climbed into his arms, closing my eyes as I buried my head in his chest. His breathing steadied itself, and I smiled, slowly feeling sleep weighing down on my mind. "Go to sleep, baby. I'll be here when you wake."

True to his word, Kendall was right beside me when my eyes fluttered open at.. _3am. _I noticed we were in my bedroom, and I was still in my dress, but my boots were thrown to the side, and my headband laid on the nightstand, while Kendall was in gym shorts and his sweatshirt.I sighed and watched his chest rise and fall. Rise. Fall. Rise. Fall. He murmured something I didn't quite catch, so I figured he was just dreaming. Slowly, I pressed my lips to his, and he kissed back without hesitation, whispering my name into my mouth as the passion grew hotter and hotter. Finally when we parted, we were grinning and breathless.

"That was a nice way to wake up," he chuckled, pulling me down for another kiss. This one was shorter, sweeter. "What time is it?"

"About 3:30am. You can sleep if you want." I shrugged. He bit his lip and shook his head, suddenly sitting up.

"Actually, uh, could I use your shower?" he asked sheepishly.

"Um, yeah, sure?" I agreed hesitantly. But when he stood and waddled to the bathroom, it suddenly made sense. _Morning wood. Ha, poor kid._ I slipped off the dress and searched my closet for comfortable clothes. After settling on yoga pants and Kendall's jersey, I snuggled in my comforter. Where Kendall had been sleeping smelled like his cologne, and was still warm from his body heat.

"Renee, wake up." Kendall's voice brought me back to consciousness. I had dosed off while waiting for him. When he saw my outfit, his grin widened, and he smoothed his hand over my hair, kissing my temple. "What do you wanna do all day? It's 6am now." I shot up.

"I was asleep for three hours, and you didn't wake me up?" No wonder his hair wasn't wet… He pushed me back under the blankets, crawling in with me.

"I'm up for a lazy day. And the only reason I let you sleep is because I got to sleep along with you," he admitted, pulling my legs in his lap, throwing his arm around my shoulders. I pressed my toes against his calf. "Damn, you're always freezing, aren't you?"

"Pretty much. So a lazy day, huh? How are we supposed to eat breakfast?" Before I'd even finished the question, Lewis came in with a tray of food. Blueberry waffles, bacon, eggs, orange juice… "Thank you, Lewis!" I called out, chewing on a strip of bacon.

"Don't thank me. Kendall made it."

I cocked an eyebrow at him. "So you're telling me that you came out the shower, saw that I was sleeping, fell asleep beside me, woke up, made breakfast, woke me up, and suggested a lazy day as a part of your 'plan?'" He nodded, and I smiled through my waffle.

After our breakfast, we watched romantic comedies and action thrillers and anything under the sea. Mom and Aunt Kelly were having a bonding day, and Lewis only bothered us for snack breaks, but other than that, we were alone. We snuck kisses in between movies and kept close to each other, not willing to let go. The day slowly fell away, and Kendall went home after dinner, leaving his side of the bed cold and lonely.


	5. Chapter 5

**Yeah, yeah, I'm bad with updating, blah blah blah. Now that that's over with, I should tell you that it's finally summer over here in bipolar-weathered Virginia. I took my last two exams today. This means two things; One, I can write a lot more often. Two, I might not always be able to update, because I have to visit my mom, and she doesn't have internet. Stupid, right? Anyways, enjoy chapter 5!**

"Hey, Cam," I greeted, falling into the lawn chair next to her, kicking off my flip-flops. She pushed her sunglasses on top of her head and glared at me.

"Don't 'Hey, Cam,' me, missy. You left me last night!"

"I didn't _leave you. _I simply was rescued by.. Well, by whatever Kendall is to me," I sighed, shrugging. On cue, he bounded over to where I was, kissing my lips briefly.

"I heard my name. What's up?"

"You're in trouble, mister," Camille smirked.

"Oh no, what'd I do?" he asked mockingly. I kicked his butt and shooed him. Flashing a smile, he jumped into the pool after James.

"So how are you and him gonna work out?"

"What'd you mean?" I questioned, burrowing my eyebrows. Camille's eyes widened and she shot up from her chair, snatching her stuff. "Camille, tell me." She bit her lip, watching Logan from the corner of her eye. He shook his head at Cam, slashing at his throat with his hand, his eyes wide. I curled my fingers around her wrist, pulling her down until she looked me in the eye.

"The guys are touring soon. They're leaving for the whole summer."

The sun seemed to cower in the clouds, blocking out all light. I released her wrist, and she rubbed it with her other hand. Kendall was standing next to James, heads close together, mouths moving a mile per minute. My bottom lip quivered as I stalked over there, and I bit it to keep from crying. I couldn't do that here.

"Were you planning on telling me?" I asked calmly. James patted Kendall's back and left, leaving just me and him and all the space between us. "Or was it your plan to kiss me and leave, not even with some warning?" He reached for me, but I shoved him away. "Why would you do that? Why didn't you tell me?"

"I was waiting for the right time," he whispered.

"And you see how well that turned out?" I cried. He looked around at everyone staring, and held out his hand, motioning for me to follow him. Hesitantly, I let him lead us up to his room, holding me during the elevator ride. My lips were pursed, and my stomach kept doing flips as he locked the door behind us. It was just us.

"How could you do this?" I whispered, sitting on the edge of the sofa. "How could you just show up and make me feel all this crap and then _leave? _You knew you were leaving. And you led me on, just to drop me once you went on tour." I jabbed a finger at his chest. "You're just another douchebag singer that only cares for himself."

"Honestly, Renee, you really think if I only cared about myself that I would've just _slept _while I was at your house? Do you think that I would've _made you breakfast _and _watched romantic comedies _with you all day? God, can't you see that I'm just trying to spend as much time with you as I can before I leave?" He ran his fingers through his hair, pacing. "This is driving me insane, Ren. It is. If I didn't have to go, I wouldn't."

"Why didn't anybody tell me? Why would Camille ask for a girls' night out if she knew we had so little time together?" I jeered, more mad at her than Kendall. "When do you leave?"

"I wanted to tell you myself. Camille asked you on a girls' night out because you need to learn how L.A. is without me and the guys," he explained, sitting next to me, taking my hands in his. "We leave in two weeks."

"How long will you be gone?" I whispered.

"Two months," he murmured against the crown of my hair, kissing my temple. I curled in his lap, pursing my lips, keeping the tears in. "I know, Ren. It sucks. But we'll get through it, okay? We can use webcams and stuff." He clenched his jaw, his fingers wrapped around strands of my hair. "I can't lose you."

"And you won't," I promised, "I'll be here when you get back."

"Good. Now enough of this depressing stuff. Let's make these last two weeks count." He grinned, and ran his fingers through my hair. "How about we go to the beach?"

**Time Skip

It took a while to get there, but we were finally at Malibu with all the guys and Camille on our heels. We all went our separate ways once we were there. Camille & Logan went off to who-knows-where and James & Carlos went to go host a party they'd planned in Griffon's beach house. Kendall and I found ourselves in the water, splashing and dunking each other, the past few days slipping from our minds like a hand on an oiled-up doorknob.

After we'd gotten enough of salt in our mouths and up our noses, we laid on the warm sand, hand-in-hand, him drawing hearts on my bare skin. "Would you rather wake up naked and sore lying next to the Burger King saying 'you had it your way' or wake up naked next to Ronald McDonald saying 'you were loving it'?" I asked. We'd been playing Would You Rather for the past twenty minutes or so. He chuckled, poking my sides until I couldn't breathe from laughing too much.

"Probably the latter," he admitted, still chuckling. "Would you rather be able to read minds or fly?" I thought it over, stroking my chin sarcastically.

"Read minds. Definitely. I'd never have to study for a test again." I turned on my side to look at him, propping my head up with my free hand. "But then again, it'd be hell to have to listen to a horny person's thoughts."

"Touché. I'd rather you be able to fly, because then you could fly me places, and I'd never have to get my driver's license."

"You just want that so I won't be able to hear your thoughts," I teased, poking his chest. "Who's to say I can't read your mind right now?"

"Okay, then what am I thinking about, right now?" he countered, challenging me. I leaned in with a smile, kissing his lips slowly, hooking my fingers around his shirt. "Damn, I guess you can read minds," he chuckled, his voice thick.

"That was more of a lucky guess."

"So it wasn't your unbearable desire that led you to kiss me?" he joked, watching as I kicked his shin. He faked being hurt, mocking my wimpy kick, cradling where I hit. I kissed him again, this time ending it abruptly when it got intense, standing up and wiping the sand off of my shorts. "What? You can't leave me at that!"

"Oh I think I just did," I smirked, holding my flip-flops as he chased me, weaving in and out of other people's umbrellas and towels before he finally caught me from behind, my body suddenly suspended in air as he threw me over his shoulder. "What the hell, Kendall?" I laughed, but my voice was strangled, his shoulder driving into my gut. Then I was laying on my back again, on our towel, his mouth against mine urgently, falling into the pattern that'd we'd come to know in the days that we'd known each other. He nipped at my bottom lip and I tangled my hands in his silky hair, my eyes squeezed shut as I lost myself in the moment, thoughts on overload, although I wasn't paying attention to them.

How I could think, but not listen, I didn't know.

Kendall made everything make sense, but nothing understandable.

"Whoa, am I interrupting something?" James chuckled, falling onto the towel beside me. Kendall receded from between my legs and glared at James as he pulled me in his lap. "Sorry dude, but the party is dying up there. Thought I'd see what everybody else was doing."

"What about Logan and Camille?" I inquired, my heart still pumping fast, blood running cold without Kendall's body heat warming it.

"They ran off somewhere. We think they're.." James began, checking to see if anybody else was listening. When he was sure they weren't, he continued. "Hooking back up."

Kendall's face grew dark, but in a flash, it was gone again. He smiled at me, but there was something in his eyes that I couldn't quite read. Regret? Anger? Memories flooded in my mind, and I covered my face with my hands.

_"Oakley," Cody whispered, tilting my head up with two fingers, making me look him in the eye. His eyes were filled with rage, guilt. "What'd you do?" _

_ "What does it look like, you whore," I spat, squeezing the shattered glass in my palm. He pried it from my grasp and threw it in the trash. _

_ "Oh, I'm the whore, huh? What about you? Just because we're on a break sometimes doesn't give you the right to go screw everybody in the fucking town!" he screeched, his fist landing on the mirror, the remaining glass falling to the bloody tile. He took two deep breaths before grabbing a first-aid kit and cleaning up my bleeding wrist. _

_ "It does give me a right, Cody. You don't have a right to go and charm girls you pick up in the club while I'm at home, taking care of your kid!" I tried to wriggle from his grasp, but he only tightened his hold. His nails dug into the already messy cuts. "Fuck, that hurts, Cody! Let me go!" I cried out, my voice heavy and my eyelids drooping. He finally let go as I fell to the floor. _

"Renee?" James' worried tone carried me back to reality. My left wrist was wrapped in gauze, and I gave him a questioning look. "You kinda lost consciousness there. You were clawing at yourself, and you started bleeding and.." His sentence broke off into a sigh. "Just don't do that again. Kendall nearly had a heart attack." Everybody came into view now. Kendall was sitting on the edge of the couch, where I assume I'd been moved. Carlos was standing next to James with a worried look etched on his face. Logan and Camille were outside on the deck, bickering. I pursed my lips, trying to think of an excuse as to why I would faint… And claw myself.

"Can I talk to Kendall alone?" I croaked. They all nodded and left. When I looked back to the deck, Logan and Camille were gone. Kendall looked at me expectantly, and I sat up, pulling my knees to my chest. "Cody and I had a peculiar relationship." He tried to stop me, but I held up my hand, silencing him. "You need to hear this. Anyways, we were different, and we knew it. After one month of being together, we were more… _intense _than other couples. We were violent. We'd fight more often than any couple I'd known. We treated each other like shit. Hitting, punching, kicking, biting, screaming.. It was a daily thing for us.." I sighed, ruffling my hair. "Normal. It was normal." Finally I met Kendall's mossy eyes, and I fell a little harder for him.

Wait… What?

"Then I came here. You were so different. You made me realize that it _wasn't _normal. That it was wrong. That it was wrong." I shrugged, lifting my hand to caress his cheek, but he grabbed it instead, unraveling the gauze. Purple bruises ran across my wrist, plain against red-specked nail marks. Instead of hiding my scars, they made them stand out more. He traced every single one, and I fell asleep to his touch.

**Time Skip

My legs were tangled with Kendall's as all of us sat around on his couch, reminiscing over the few weeks we'd all spent together. Laughter filled the void where crying would soon be, the clock ticking faster and faster. Midnight soon arrived and everybody slowly fell away, leaving Kendall and I to kiss and listen to our steady breathing.

When I woke, he was about to leave. I pulled him down into my arms, kissing him one last time. Then he was gone, and Ms. Knight was holding me. I hadn't realized I was crying until her jasmine perfume hung in the air, and I pressed my cheek against the hollow of her neck, thankful for the DNA resemblance she had with Kendall. It wasn't the same, but it was close enough for the time being.


	6. Chapter 6

**I've been at my mom's for the past week, and I swear, it sucks not having internet. I've been writing for, like, three days straight. I feel like this isn't that great of a chapter, because I really don't like writing scenes without Kendall, but I also feel like the ending makes up for it. Oh, and thank you to all my reviewers! It makes me happy that people are still reading my story! Anyways, enjoy chapter 6!**

One more week. That was nothing compared to the past seven, but the last was the hardest. Most of the time we'd been in different time zones, and I'd be asleep while he was waking up, and when I woke up, he'd be in a concert. It killed me, after so many weeks of spending so much time with them, to be alone. I had Camille, and Katie, and even Mama Knight. But I still went to bed every night knowing he wasn't just down the road.

"_Hello? _Earth to Renee?" Katie called out, waving a hand in front of my face. I worried my bottom lip with my teeth, watching as she sighed and answered my phone. "Hey, Big Bro… Renee is currently staring off into space." She handed the phone to me and I pressed it to my ear, desperate to hear Kendall's calm voice.

"Kendall?" I squeaked. This was the first thing I'd said to him in the past two weeks. Both of us had always been too busy. "Shouldn't you be at a concert, or sleeping?"

"We're back to the west coast. No more time zone difference," he explained. "I miss you. I needed to hear your voice."

"I miss you too," I whispered, walking towards their kitchen. Katie continued with her video games. "Tell the guys I miss them too." My voice cracked. "It's not the same here without you. I don't see how everybody is so.. _sane. _It's quiet. How your mom can handle the peace is beyond me."

"I don't know. It's always loud around here. There's no Mom or you to tell us to shut the hell up," he chuckled quietly. I could hear the guys in the background. Tears brimmed my eyes.

"I should go, Kendall. You have things to do, and I.. I need.." _You. _"Food." I face-palmed myself. Was that really the only thing I could come up with? _Seriously? _

He just laughed. "Okay, Ren. Stay safe. I'll be home soon." I listened to the dial tone for a few seconds before slamming the phone on the counter. Mama Knight looked over from the stove, startled.

"Are you alright, Renee?" she asked, worry etched in her eyes. I nodded, waving it off. "I'm making dinner, if you'd like to help."

I rubbed the back of my neck, chewing on my lip. "Uh, I really don't know how to cook…" She brightened, grabbing my hand, pulling me further into the kitchen.

"I can show you! Come on, it'll be fun!"

"Good luck with that, Ren!" Katie called out.

Ignoring Katie's comment, Mama Knight showed me all the ingredients she'd pulled out, and explained to me what she was making. It was simply country fried steak, green beans, and mashed potatoes. All homemade. Mama Knight left me in charge of mashing the potatoes, which was a lot harder that it sounded. After accidentally mashing my fingers until they were bruised, Katie came over to help me. Despite her bitterness towards the matter, she was really good at it. I assumed in Minnesota, she and Kendall cooked a lot. Or at least watched their mom do it enough to learn secondhand.

Camille, Katie, Mama Knight, and I sat around the table, enjoying the meal that all of us had contributed to. We'd called Camille, and she had brought over some apple pie to accompany our meal.

"This is really good, Cam," I marveled, shoveling the pie in my mouth. She grinned thankfully as Mama Knight and Katie nodded in agreement. Mama Knight's phone buzzed and she pressed it to her ear.

"Oh hi, sweetie," she greeted with a mouthful of pie. "No, she's here. She's been here for the past two months, pretty much." She paused, dabbing at her mouth with her napkin. "Yeah, I'll tell her. Stay safe. Love you too." All of us cocked an eyebrow at her, and she just shrugged, sporting a sly smile. "Kendall says he misses everybody. And Katie, it's your turn to wash the dishes."

"And your turn to dry them," Katie countered.

"We'll just leave. Thanks for dinner, Mama Knight, it was amazing." I kissed her cheek and grabbed Camille on my way out the door. "Bye Katie!"

"Where exactly are we going, Renee?" Camille asked, raising her eyebrows at me.

"You wanna sleepover my house?"

"Sure, let me just ask my dad and grab some stuff," she agreed, leading me into her apartment. Her dad said yes, and she stuffed clothes in her bag before we set out, deciding to just walk there. The air was starting to cool, summer was now on the brink of autumn.

"So what's up with you and Logan?"

She drew in a breath and let it out slowly. "Well we're back together. After some bickering, of course. Considering.."

"Considering what?"

"I'm kind of, sort of… pregnant."

**Kendall's POV/ Time Skip

"Dude, seriously, brighten up, you're bringing down the mood of the whole tour bus," James whined. "There are plenty other fish in the sea. And most of them are right out there, _waiting for us to go out there and sing!_" Logan slapped the back of his head.

"We didn't break up, James! There's a difference between long-distance and breaking up, ya know," I sighed. "Plus, you gave me the same speech after Jo. Honestly, if you're trying to cheer me up, at least think of a different dialogue."

"Okay, enough jibber-jabber. Let's get on with the concert. It's our last show, and afterwards, _lover-boy _gets to go home to his girl," Logan sighed. I stuck out my tongue at him, and he mimicked. We followed Gustavo and Kelly through the corridors, finally finding our way backstage.

"Okay, _dogs_, get dressed and meet me back out here as fast as possible. No dilly-dallying!" he screamed. Though I guess it was his normal indoor voice to himself. We all got changed and lounged around backstage before we had to go on.

"So, dude, how are you and Camille?" James asked Logan. I tensed, but bit my tongue to keep from saying anything. My phone buzzed from my pocket.

**R: Hey babe. Can't wait to see you tonight!**

**K: Me either. Sorry it'll be so late when we get back ;(**

**R: Oh, it's fine. I've got some errands to do anyway(;**

_Errands? What kind of errands does she have to do? _

"Kendall? Earth to Kendall?" Logan shoved my shoulders lightly, and I shook him off, burrowing my eyebrows. "Come on, it's time for the show." James shot me a questioning look, but I just shrugged. I'd deal with my curiosity later.

**Outsider POV

"Tickets, please," the bouncer stated. Renee Dawson handed over four tickets, and they opened the doors for the group. Renee couldn't keep the bounce out of her step, and it showed to Camille, Katie, and Mama Knight. She wore a ruffled white skirt that went just above her knees, a thick black belt, one of Kendall's green-grey plaid shirts she'd acquired with the sleeves rolled up, and her grey ballet flats. Camille, also there to watch her boyfriend sing, wore a pastel pink dress with white sequins and white Toms.

"Is my makeup good?" Renee asked worriedly, fidgeting with her fingers. Nobody had seen her so nervous. Ever. Renee was feisty, brave, strong, and nobody had suspected that she had a soft side. Kendall had been the only one that had seen it, but now Camille too.

"Yes, Ren. Stop worrying. Kendall wouldn't care if you showed up in a baggy sweatshirt with no makeup on at all," Camille sighed, ruffling her friend's hair. Renee frowned, and fixed it in the bathroom mirror.

"Easy for you to say. You and Logan have known each other a lot longer than Kendall and I. We've only been dating for three months, and two of those he wasn't even in the same state as me." She let her head fall in her hands, and Camille slapped her arm.

"Come on, Renee! Where's the feisty she-demon we all fell in love with? Kendall likes you _a lot. _And if you can't see that, then you really need to get your eyesight checked." Smiling again, Renee nodded and led everybody out into the audience, her dominant demeanor faithfully restored.

Meanwhile, backstage, Kendall chugged a bottle of water, wishing for the concert to be over so he could see Renee. Not that he didn't love his fans or what he did, he just couldn't stand another minute away from her. Hopefully, the two months away from each other would only bring them closer, not further apart. He shook off thoughts of her, not wanting to get too distracted, and ran over the lyrics to _Elevate. _That would be their first song, and he didn't want to forget anything because of a girl.

"Dogs! Get out there!"

"Now or never, buddy," Logan quipped, patting his back as they ran out on stage. "Hey, Cali, how's it going?" he asked the crowd. They roared in response.

After the first few songs, they got to _Worldwide. _

"Perfect," Renee said to Camille, pulling her towards the stage. "Come on Cam, we're gonna break some girls' hearts tonight." _First come, first serve, right? _Renee thought to herself as the crowd pushed her closer to the boys. She was mere feet away from him. He hadn't seen her yet, focused on the songs and the stage. She reached out for him, like the other screaming girls, but got James instead. He winked at her, recognizing her.

_Wait a minute_

_Before you tell me anything, how was your day?_

Then Kendall was there, singing for her, his mossy eyes glistening in the dim lighting. Again, she reached out for him, and this time he caught her.

_Cause I've been missing you by my side, yeah_

James took over again.

_Did I awake you out of your dreams? _

_I'm sorry but I couldn't sleep_

Kendall kept holding her hand as he sung.

_You calm me down _

_There's something 'bout the sound of your voice_

Her eyes widened as she was suddenly pulled onto stage, his arms wrapping around her waist, his breath at her ear as he melodized with the other guys. They grinned knowingly, and the stage crew pulled out two chairs, one for her, the other for Camille.

Carlos' voice piped in.

_I-I-I-I'm never, never_

Logan smiled through his line.

_Never as far away as it may seem, oh_

Carlos.

_Soon we'll be together _

James.

_We'll pick up right where we left off_

_Paris, London, Tokyo _

_There's just one thing I gotta do_

_And I can hardly take another goodbye_

_Baby, won't be long_

_You're the one I'm waiting on_

Kendall kept singing to Renee, Logan to Camille, James and Carlos to the still screaming fans. Renee thought back to the day in the sound booth, but this was a different song, a different kind of butterflies that pounded in her stomach. She squeezed Kendall's hand, anxiously waiting for the song to end so she could finally kiss him again.

Logan.

_Girl, I'll be thinking about you worldwide, worldwide, worldwide_

_Girl, I'll be thinking about you worldwide, worldwide, worldwide_

_Yes, I may meet a million pretty girls that know my name_

_But don't you worry _

Kendall met her hazel eyes and kissed her hand, singing his part.

_Cause you have my heart _

Logan kept singing to Camille, who took spotlight well.

_It ain't easy to keep on moving city to city _

_Just get up and go_

Kendall.

_The show must go on, so I need you to be strong_

And the show went on, the songs reverberating in their ears, happy to finally be reunited, Mama Knight and Katie cheering louder than any of the fans out there. Finally the song ended, and Renee jumped from her seat and kissed Kendall fiercely, not caring that people were watching. She was home, in his arms, and he held on tightly, no intentions of ever letting go again.


End file.
